Avoid Power Struggles with Potty Training

Question

Potty training woes with a 2 1/2 year old.
We started potty training our son about 9 months ago. We started out by getting rid of diapers completely, but after about 5 months we couldn't take all the poopy underwear and accidents on the floor.
When he is home 5 days a week, he wears underwear or nothing when in the house. i have tried so many approaches its hard to remember. I have read through the potty training book twice. We tried gating him in the bathroom when the potty bell went off every hour to 45 min but would often bring on a power struggle with lots of tantrums. We have tried treats, doesn't work. Tried no toys after an accident, doesn't work either. He mostly has accidents when playing with toys or eating a meal at the table. He wears a diaper at night time because he would poop in his bed sometimes and with how long this has drawn out, we thought that we would focus on daytime and then diapers after he got a handle on it. He is in a toddler bed now but I did not think that his accidents would continue this far into the future. He goes to daycare twice a week and she has him in a pull up and rewards him with treats if he goes on the potty. She gets mixed results. He is very articulate for yrs old. He can talk and understand a lot, so he says he understands the expectations, but struggles with this. About 3 months ago we tried a "reset" during a vacation but when we came back he continued to struggle. What can we do? Thank you!

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