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Teach Tweenager How to Manage Anger

Question

Hi There,
My daughter will be 11 yo on February, she is such a sweet/sensetive girl who likes to please others, but when she becomes angry she can not control it , she melts down for a while then comes and says sorry. she is a rebellion a bit, for example, when we say no for something, she does not accept it, she argues a lot and tells us that she has the worst life, she forgets everything she has and every privilege we give her at that moment. I applied the ticket system on her, it worked a bit, but the thing I feel that she is more mature than that, the ticket works for small things only. for example, she did not have a phone before, she has an iPad, which we let her uses once a week or twice, she has been begging us to get her one, finally, my husband got her an iPhone because we want her to have it in case of emergencies or going to her friends, we put parental restriction and limited screen time. since she got it, she has been complaining that we do not allow her to use more screen time because we don't trust her, I explained to her that I would have not gave her an I phone if I do not trust her, but those devices are used only for calls, sms, music, and few educational games. So at the end we decided to take it from her for 2 days. she went crazy and reacted in a way that I have never seen her doing it before. she cracked her self crying and begging, I think she was not even aware of what she was saying at all, she told us why we turn her life to hell, why we are not like other parents, why we give her the worst life...and many other whys. That was all because of taking it for 2 days, at the end she said I will kill myself. after half an hour, I was going to run errands I told her to come with me. she sat in the car, and started to apologize for being selfish and not appreciating what she has and what we do, and also that she gets angry and she has to let it out and she can not control it. I am telling you she is a sweetheart who wanna be like others, and doe not know how to manage her anger. what should I do to help her get better????

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