Our daughter turned 3 in May and it was around that time that we became aware of John Rosemond's books. We learnt that we were not authoritative in our parenting style nor did we use alpha speech, etc. Since then we have been working on this (it really takes time for me to make that change but I am working on it every day) and things are going a lot better. Our daughter obeys quite well but there are some "silent' forms of disobedience: it seems like she did not hear us, we told her previously do to something (e.g. close the toilet seat and close the door after bathroom use) but she always "forgets", and often times it is me who thinks she did not understand what I asked her or I think what I asked her is too difficult (although I make sure my demands are age appropriate) because she is so young... I introduced the tickets system last week with 5 tickets and the only rule is: she needs to obey the first time we tell her something. 5 out of 8 days she lost her 5 tickets in the afternoon and I sent her to her room; resulting in a huge tantrum... Is this the right approach? I am very insecure as I feel she obeys quite well although not all the time: should I first work on my leadership and alpha speech before putting her on the tickets program? Should I continue with the program?