"Parents cannot effectively communicate their love to a child unless they are also a source of effective authority. "

The Better Half

Question

I have 2 step-daughters, ages 11 and 8, who spend half of their time with us and half with their mom. We don’t allow them to use any form of social media and have explained to them the dangers. However, at their mom’s, they do anything they want, so we have found accounts on apps like music.ly and sing, as well as Snapchat and Facebook. We haven’t been sure how to handle this, besides letting them know that we do not allow it because we care about them and want to protect them. Should they be disciplined by us when they do things at their mom’s house? I worry things will get worse as they get older, because they have little to no discipline and hardly any stability with their mom (they’ve been in 4 different homes with 2 boyfriends in the last year with her). This has caused them to sometimes prefer to be with us and ask to stay extra days since they feel more secure and I think they like having some structure, but I worry as they get to be teens they will prefer not having rules.

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