"Parents cannot effectively communicate their love to a child unless they are also a source of effective authority. "

Homesteading adult son.

Question

Our son is a 27 year old college graduate, (major is business/management) who still lives at home. He does have a full time job working at a K-5 school, but does not make anywhere near enough to move out on his own. He is very responsible when it comes to getting to work on time and doing a good job, and he apparently is applying for better jobs but hasn’t yet scored on one. He and I get into some heated arguments. I don’t believe he is working hard enough to find that better job. And he is out nearly every night at the gym and/or visiting his friends. In the meantime, his room is a disaster and his laundry sits for days. He acts resentful when I call him out on it. My husband, his step dad, is much more measured and calm when he addresses these issues. I love my boy, but it is so frustrating that he is not out on his own yet. Sometimes I find myself suspecting he is dragging his feet and playing the “oh woe is me, I just can’t find a better job” card.

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