"To be an effective disciplinarian, you must be a model of self-discipline. "

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Question

I have a 16-year-old son whom I have custody of 50% of the time. His father is very permissive and expects no chores. I am not and have expectations of household help. He consistently refuses, "forgets" to do or does poorly at his chores. I have read Teen-Proofing and am implementing the suggestions. The problem is that I can only establish authority over half his life and the techniques are not proving effective. If I refuse to give him discretionary money, for example, he just gets it from his father. If I refuse to let him go to an event he just goes to his father's house and does it anyway. Am I out of luck with establishing authority?

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