Question
I am really enjoying John's book, Teen Proofing! Thanks, John!
We have a brand new 12-year-old boy who has switched over from being kind, thoughtful, and sweet to being disrespectful, gregarious, and rude. It's been a heartache and very confusing.
How do I get my tween to "own" his health? By that I mean, we have noticed that if he does not take supplements (especially b's and c), his behavior gets much worse. We're not blaming this - it's just one contributing factor.
It seems like the reminding is pushing him away. But, I am concerned about his health! I've studied what John has said about micromanaging, and for years I have tried to avoid being a helicopter mom. I've asked my husband to take more of a lead (reminding our son instead of me), because he seems to have more respect for his dad. Another thing that makes this stressful and impractical, especially at school, is that he refuses to swallow them - says he can't, no matter what we try - and chews them with large doses of milk. So frustrating!
We take our supplements, so we are trying to be a good example. And I've tried to make a chart, have HIM make a chart to keep on top of it himself, I bought an expensive buzzer watch to remind him at school (he lost it), tried saying nothing (and then he doesn't take them and his behavior takes a dive).
When he's disrespectful I usually say something like, "That sounded disrespectful, try that again." But, at least once a week, when he is mean and disrespectful (and his dad calls him on it but doesn't require consequences), I break down in tears. I believe that's probably not wise, but it may be good for him to see that his sinful words and attitude is hurting people around him. He has some days where he's in a better mood.
I appreciate any advice you might have. Thank you so much for your time!
