Question
I'm needing clarification on what it means to be a parent-centred home, rather than a child-centred home when we have youngish child of 3.5 and 6.5. Could you direct me to resources for guidance on this?
My husband and I have realised recently that we seem to be quite unable to get much done with the children around, and we have concluded that this is not right. We should be able to get some of our stuff done, as we find ourselves scrambling to get office/admin stuff, and my long piano practice sessions done late at night after their bedtime. We are usually really tired by then.
When they are around us, there's constant interruptions to what we may be doing, asking for attention, "Look mummy! Look!!" If ignored, they'll fight, whine or whatever. We still need to parent of course, but I'd like some guidance and perspective as to how much attention the children need without me being neglectful or disinterested in their lives. The last thing I want is for the children to think we're not interested, or aloof about anything they do. To put into perspective, they do ask silly questions, do the "LOOK mummy" every couple of minutes (especially the younger one). We kind of have to banish them elsewhere but its not always possible we have a small house and there's nowhere much to send them off to play. Sometimes we just turn on the TV though I resist this most of the time.
There's also chores, homework, music practice, and family time - if we can manage it! what's a good supervision/family plan? Let them do it and report back - have a consequence if not done (If i'm not there to supervised or remind, it either takes a really really long time) or it doesn't get done until I check back with them. My 6.5 also does not do anything if I don't tell her to. Should I be expecting her to take some responsibility in remembering to do her homework and chores at this age? I am still supervising the younger one with his chores - supervising both is challenging as well because of the resistance that they display, and the help they keep asking for!
So what exactly do we have to do in order to keep the family parent-centred? Some practical suggestions would be welcome!
