"If your child accuses you of being "mean," you must have done something right. "

15-year-old doesn't like being "un-hinged!"

Question

We have an adopted son, almost 16 yo, who has been with us for 2 1/2 years. He spent most of his earlier life in an over-crowded orphanage, with very little male influence and little supervision. While there he ran with older boys, frequently sneaked out, skipped school and basically played as much as he wanted. He is making good progress, but still causes us some problems. Two months ago he stayed out somewhere in the neighborhood until after 1:45 a.m. My husband removed his bedroom door and since then he has become much more accountable about his whereabouts. But, he is now sleeping on our family room sofa (in an open room, connected to kitchen) frequently until noon. I'm not comfortable being in his 'new bedroom' while he's there. He also stays upstairs in the girls' bedroom until long after we go to bed. One of those girls is not his biological sister, and is 17. My husband has said nothing to him, other than removing the door. I think he should be in his room, regardless of the 'inconvenience' of others seeing him because he got himself into this dilemma. My husband says we should just put the door back on, but I suspect he will start sneaking around again. It seems to me that our son is the winner here, for the most part. Any suggestions?

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