Forgetfulness or defiance.


HI there, I have a question regarding my very imaginative 5 year old who is sometimes very much in her head that she doesn't hear certain instructions. We have taken care of the defiance issue for now, it seems to be under control.

However I'm not sure what to do about situations where she forgets what she's told to do? For example this morning, I told her that after she puts away the dishes, she needs to tidy up her bedroom. She does the dishes, and forgets to tidy up the bedroom..and I only find out after. And then after lunch, I tell her to put her dirty dishes in the sink, and then go and change out of her ballet things. She puts the dirty dishes in the sink, then goes and wash her hands. Then she forgets she's meant to get out of her ballet things. I find myself repeating instructions because she either forgets or didn't hear me. Is it reasonable to expect 5 year olds to remember 2 step instructions? I do make eye contact, and often make her repeat what she's supposed to do. But this doesn't really seem to help either.

Not sure if I should just treat it as childishness and gently remind, or enforce something similar to 'Not doing what she's told' regardless of forgetfulness or defiance. These are two separate intentions though. I am a very busy mum with a million things to do, I also have a wilful 2-year old to deal with. I find it extremely tiring to give instructions, and then find that it's not done and have to repeat or chase after the 5 year old to do this and that. What are your thoughts and opinions on what should be done?

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