4-Year-Old Gets Frustrated Easily

Question

My son is 4 yrs. He is an only child. When trying something new, he gets very frustrated very fast if he can't do it right within a couple tries. This happens when practicing numbers, letter or anything new. I remind him that he is doing great and to keep trying. That he will understand more as he practices.

In general he is a perfectionist. Things often need to be 'just so'. I am a little concerned as there is depression on both sides of our families. My dad wasn't ever formally diagnosed but I'm sure he had OCD to some extent.....and my brother suffers from
OCD and severe anxiety.....but, that's a whole 'nother topic.

I have heard that the whole perfectionist thing can be an 'oldest child' characteristic (or an only child characteristic?)?

I understand that you can't diagnose anything here...but, is this sounding normal at all for his age and everything?

Could this be a result of his dad and I separating? What else can I say to him in order to help him to NOT be so hard on himself? What can I say to him to encourage him in these situations? I'd like to find the balance between trying to encourage him without pushing him so far that he rebels (for lack of a better word) and refuses to even try.

Thank you

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