19 Year Old Home For the Holidays


This is another question concerning our daughter (just turned 19). She is home for the holidays as she continues to attend a Bible College. She has seemed to continue to be "distant" - not coming home much and reluctant to reciprocate love and show appreciation. However, my wife and I noticed a softening and more congenial attitude this time. That was until last night. It was one of those small things that got blown out of proportion. She was out in a vehicle talking with her younger sister and my married son stopped by and was wanting to talk to them before he left. I went out to the car and tapped on the window. My daughter just waved at me, so I motioned for her to roll the window down. I was just going to tell them that their brother was wanting to talk with them before he left. She continued to just wave at me. It was lightly raining and I motioned a few more time and then went back into the house. When they came back in the house, I asked who was the rude one that wouldn't roll down the window. In the dark, I could not tell which daughter was on that side of the car. The younger one said it was the older one and that she told her to see what I wanted. The older one became very defensive and said that they were in a serious conversation and would not allow me to interrupt them. It continued in a heated discussion of what should have been done in that situation. She was angry that I was "making her out as a horrible person in front of all her siblings". We ended the discussion with prayer which she seemed very angry that I would try to bring forgiveness and healing that way. I have been so bothered since then. It was hard to sleep and I find myself going over and over it in my mind. So now...what should be done. Should I try to move on without any more discussion? Should I meet with her privately and explain my feelings including the last year of hurt by her responses and ask her to express her feelings? Should I apologize for offending her in the way I handled the situation? Is so, do I do that in front of everyone that was present? Do I wait and see what her demeanor is over the rest of break? Please give me some Godly counsel as I feel this is going to cast a cloud over the rest of the holiday unless God helps us. Thanks!

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