Tired and Grumpy

Question

My 4 year old's behaviour is worse after school when she is tired and ready for a nap. We are on a 5-ticket system with 2 target behaviours 1) refusing to comply with parental requests 2) being rude to parents. This includes eye-rolling, shutting her ears when we talk to her, saying things in a rude manner to parents e.g. "DO IT YOURSELF!" when asked to do something. She gets one sticker each day she does not lose all her tickets.

The question is, should I continue being consistent with my standards when she is tired or even grumpy from whatever that's happened in school? She behaves badly when someone's been nasty to her/snatched from her etc. She behaved terribly at home when someone hit her at kinder each time she went. I have taught her to call out their name loudly and say "STOP IT!". Well that has stopped for good, he's her friend now. But I can't prevent bad days at kinder/school. We all have days where we feel like garbage and treat others around us less amicably than we like to. This girl's not one to talk about her day too much unless prompted. Even then, she doesn't say too much and I don't push the issue. I do wish she would verbally express herself more. She's stoic and hard to read (like her father and unlike me whom people can read like a book sometimes) - it has been like this since she was a baby and I've always found it hard to read her moods and signals. She won't look upset or seem bothered by anything at all, but her naughty behaviour sometimes tells me something *may* be off. Often, its just a testy patch. but *sometimes* its that she's genuinely upset/worried about something, like that boy who hit her each time she went to kinder. I can never tell though. Any advice?

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