My husband and I are in an endless cycle that is tearing down our relationship. We have 3 boys 4,6 & 9. What I consider unpleasant but normal child behavior (constant interruptions, some degree of chaos, always wanting mommy's attention), he considers unacceptable behavior. I try to occupy them & keep them out of his hair, but he can't tolerate any degree of noise, mess, and especially interruptions. Inevitably, he loses his temper, screaming at them, demanding instantaneous silence, throwing out their toys, popping their hand or face, often with little warning to them. And that's when I lose my temper at him. We get along great when we have a babysitter, but being together as a family is almost universally unpleasant and ends in a fight.
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