My grandson is 9 years old and lives with his mother and stepfather. My son spends every other week end and about 2-3 hrs during the week with my grandson. My grandson has few rules and no consequences when he is with my son. Because he spends limited time with him, he prefers to be his friend, not the adult. We (and his mother) agree that our son needs to be more of a loving leader than a buddy. We all need professional counseling which his mother and we have agreed to; how do we go about trying to get the counseling started? Do my husband and I meet with a counselor first and then go from there? Do we try to meet all together? How do we get started?