13 yo Cell Phone Use--To Tell or Not to Tell?

Question

My 13 year old son was given a phone. We have placed parental controls which has blocked all internet access, gives us alerts when he attempts to search. We control the amount of time he uses it for games and monitor texts. One of his texts, from a friend of his, gave him a you tube site that connected him to videos that are racist, using every bad word in the dictionary. We spoke to him and took the phone away-he lost the phone previously for his behavior/bad language. The phone will not be returned . My question is do we talk about this to his friend's parents, who I know would not accept this either, or leave it alone. I know I would want to be told but that might not be the right way to handle this.

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