I am continuing to have trouble with my defiant 9-year old daughter. She consistently refuses to do as told (and yes we tell, not ask). She has violent reactions every time we say no and she is unable to get past even a small "injustice" done to her. She throws things, trashes her room, and tries to hurt people in the family. This can go on for hours after one "no". Tonight after her raging, she refused to shower and go to bed (fell asleep on the couch). Tomorrow I can just see her refusing to go to school. I am going to kick her out of the garden, I just have been unable to get a day off to do it without her present. It will not be until next week. Up till then, how do I handle these daily outbursts? I am drained. Electronics and extra-curricular activities have already been taken away. We do employ leadership parenting principles, and the older and younger siblings respond to that just fine. Same behavioral issues are going on with her in school (inability to get past any small incident and outrageous reactions to anything that doesn't go her way) and they are urging us to get her evaluated. No academic issues though (B's and A's). What to do?