Question
(See past responses) As you know our 18y old daughter ran off & living with controlling boyfriend-it’s been a struggle causing so much hurt & pain in the family. She has been extremely rude/disrespectful when or if she texts – she gets ZERO response from me – when she is respectful I respond RIGHT AWAY. She is like she has “deaf ears” – Due to all the disrespectfulness we have not contacted her & she only is texting at times demanding/rude things-Between Facebook comments from other family members to church members, co-workers telling us things of her disrespectfulness-I wasn’t an active Facebook user so I CANCELLED that. I told others that I appreciate their concern but I wish not to hear all the negativity Emily has towards us parents-My husband & I always felt that we were under minded by other family members-It was too much chaos/stress/pain between my husband family members as the parent unit was not supported-some who thought they were supporting actually took alliance of teenager – which sent message to our daughter-my parents aren’t good nor worth respecting. My husband & I stepped away for our health, (mental & physical),our marriage, our faith. We have not contacted them (nor they us much except for saying this is unhealthy for the family) We were cleaning up old computer opened a folder where daughters cell phone was backed up to-we looked at a few text between close family members & our daughter it was not good, they did NOT speak well of us parents. This confirmed to us what we had felt all along-my husband talk to his brother-his brother didn’t want to listen much-he wanted us to sweep this all under the rug & pretend like nothing happened & get back to the way it was-he said “how could you not be in contact with your daughter” my husband said when she wants to talk & treat us with respect & dignity-then his brother said “so you’re throwing this whole family away” It’s hard to be a Christian & stand firm for your household Christian landscape-we aren’t changing our parenting for a teenager & make everyone else “happy” & our daughter happy/comfortable- kids make better choices if they respect/fear something – I get tired of everyone saying they don’t want to hurt our daughters “feelings” - Its almost Thanksgiving & our family hates us-So we decided we are spending our thanksgiving volunteering service meals to the less fortunate – Good for our 10yr old son.- What to you say to family members that think its ok to under mind the "parent unit" to me they don't care about our daughter because this is ultimately hurting her.
