The Grandparent Dilemna


Single mom had son at age 46...called day before and said homeless,,,2 weeks before I retired, I now 71, am stepmom. Husband is 78..not a loving father, but loves grandson. Lived with us 11 months, now live behind us.
She is teenage mentality, TV never off, hoarder. Tried at age 3 and age 7 to get them to mental 6 he pulled out non loose teeth, and at 7 "cut" himself twice.
She went 2 or 3 times, basically told worker his misbehaviors and never returned. She has had 8 surgeries since2006..wakes up grumpy..on narcotic pain meds and sleep, plus a handful of other about 200 lbs..they eat carbohydrates, nitrates, processed, and never drink water at home...Gatorade or pop or Sunny D. She works 4 hours a day.
Her Hoarding is almost to point of no empty spaces. We pay for Christian school and buy his clothes.
He has no training or chores. He worries over mom..helps her do her janitor job at night...gets to bed at 9 or after.
They camp every weekend from May and until it gets too cold out in woods. He's afraid to leave her as she fell and hurt herself and cries a lot re plain issues.
She seldom attends church...cries through worship...he won't leave her and they lean on each other through service, she's only been 2 times this past year. She is very compassionate to the underdog and animals, doesn't know a to needy..very withdrawn from my loving family on holidays and spends time either with little kids or brings book or is ill and doesn't attend. He's good boy, minds. Does not want to play sports.
Question...what is my role besides loving, praying, and guiding.

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