18 year old Family Chaos


(see Previous posts)As you know my twin 18yr daughter went off to live w boyfriend on 8/10/14 I do NOT support that (I completely cut her off financially).she was raised in Christian home..my husband is deacon of church,on church boards, on board at our Christian school..we were raised to work hard for what you have but daughter disrepects our family values(plus boyfriend made her change beliefs by degrading her) she no longer contacts me=she's persuading my other twin #2 daughter to go down same path as #1 twin boyfriend says no longer have to listen or respect parents-Twin #2 is 100% financially supported by us (car, cell, college,horses,car insurance,she does pay for gas though)she first said she is living at home to learn to b financially ready & focus on getting good college education & go to vet school - its proven opposite she's always gone even on weeknights..she doesn't communicate..she sometimes feeds horses but that's it..never see her open a college book..saw a paper that was graded 2.5/10 professor wrote not complete & missing papers...I pay $860 per month college tuition..Today she was supposed to work & asked if she could go to #1 twin place to do homework..she text later asked if she could just spend night..then called said she didn't have to work but got a lot of homework done..I could tell she was lying as that is getting to be habit..she got disrespectful..I told her to come home..she text me 3x's why cant I stay..then last text I am staying here tonight..its now 11pm I have to work in a.m. but cant sleep cuz of this.Twin #1 boyfriend is so controlling-he's gotten to twin#2..Do I just let Twin#2 walk all over me & let her do what she wants & be gone ALL the time?? She doesn't help around house..Twin#1 boyfriend used to say I hold things over girls head as threats..(he made twin#1 believe once youre 18 no more listening to parents & you shouldn't be expected to do anything around house if you don't want to as rules don't apply anymore....How to I calmly but firmly do with my Twin #2 daughter..should she only be allowed to be gone a couple nights during weeknight & not gone every weekend?? what about college costs and grades & her twin #1 sister and her disrespectful BF?? I need some sanity... help!!! Our whole family is still in turmoil.

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