Carri - this is a follow-up question.
Yes, I do think I might be over disciplining. I am getting very frustrated with our six-year-old twin girls because when I tell them to do something (I do not ask or explain why and I use short, direct sentences), they often do not listen to me/us the first time. They also tend to bicker a lot and I just get tired of hearing it. I have been over using time-out and you are right - it doesn't work. You are also right in that I am the one who needs to change! I don't want to be "on them" all the time. I am going to the book store today to find John's "Well Disciplined Child". But I would also like to know - Is it right to expect our kids to do what we ask the first time we tell them?