"A child who has learned to pay attention to parents will go to school prepared to pay attention to teachers. "

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Co-sleeping?

Posted on 5/6/2017

how to address the issue of a child sleeping in bed with mother and father.

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School Problems for a 7 year old

Posted on 5/3/2017

7 year old son smacked a classmate's hand while walking by their desk. When asked why by the vice principal his response was he "thought it was funny". Need to nip this in the bud, this is his 3rd...

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Wild Monkey at Naptime

Posted on 5/1/2017

I try to make a regular one hour quiet time for my 3 year old daughter every afternoon but things usually end negatively. She has, from birth, been a high needs kiddo and playing by herself seems...

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Pre-Teen's New Found Rigidity

Posted on 5/1/2017

My 11-year-old boy will some days be extremely legalistic. This morning he said he needed to read the Bible for 13 million hours, look up a YouTube video to know how to make his bed perfectly, not...

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Dressing an Alligator Toddler

Posted on 4/29/2017

Do you have any advice for parents when trying to dress a toddler starts to resemble gator wrestling?

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Beware of TMI!

Posted on 4/28/2017

Hello, Our 7 year old son asked me last night at our family dinner, "what does the word that is spelled F U C K .... mean? When he asked, it was just me at the table, as my husband, had...

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Time to Throw out The "Time-Out"

Posted on 4/27/2017

What approach is best when a 27 month old gets up and giggles when put in a time out chair? I have put him back in, but he keeps laughing.... I'm only putting him in time out for a very short...

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Brothers don't have to be friends

Posted on 4/26/2017

I have a 7 year old boy and a 4 year old boy. They complain/compare: 'he got more apple juice than me', 'how come he got to watch t.v while he was home sick and I had to go to school?' They...

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The 14 year old rules.

Posted on 4/25/2017

This is in reference to my last question regarding my 14 year old stepson. I couldn't agree more about the parents being on the same page. Plus I have read Johns" book Teen proofing. I have...

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Authority Issues with a 12 year old

Posted on 4/19/2017

My 12 year old girl has a real issue with her authority, she talks back when asked to do anything that she does not want to do. My mother-in-law, My husband and I are continually having to talk...

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Here Come the Terrible Terrific Twos!

Posted on 4/19/2017

My usually pleasant almost 2 year old daughter just started throwing violent fits this week, kicking, screaming, and trying and sometimes succeeding in banging her head into my face. A few times...

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Grumpy 11 year old woes.

Posted on 4/17/2017

We home school our 11 and 8 year old sons. Have done so all the way through, except for one year of Christian school. We have been having problems especially with our 11-year-old, being grumpy,...

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Jekyll and Hyde almost 4 y/o boy

Posted on 4/7/2017

Please help. My son is 3 years old and will be 4 in three weeks. His behavior is getting out of hand. He doesn't behave like this anywhere else but home. He has three older sisters and he hits...

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A Blustering 3-Year-Old and the Ticket System

Posted on 4/5/2017

We have four children. Our third child is a 3.5 year old boy. He is our most "spirited" child and has the vocabulary of a 6 year old. Our 2 older children (6 & 8) are more reserved. He is so...

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Ending a soothing bad habit

Posted on 4/4/2017

My son has had a habit of chewing on his knuckle fairly regularly (and has a big callus on his middle finger to show for it), but recently it's become more frequently and has extended to other...

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Single parent struggles.

Posted on 4/3/2017

I could probably be considered guilty of putting my kids in the center of the family. Giving too much consideration to their feelings... I'm a single parent of boy/girl twins that are 10 and...

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The 3 year old is in charge.

Posted on 4/3/2017

We have an almost 3 year old whom we are having trouble with tantrums and defiance recently. I dread bringing him out because in a moment's notice, he will be screaming and kicking when told no he...

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No parenting authority produces chaos.

Posted on 3/31/2017

My stepson is about to enter high school. He will be 15 in September. Last May he vandalized his "friends" house and fathers" car to the tune of 12,000.00 which we payed. He wrote foul language...

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Adult child's negative influence on minor siblings.

Posted on 3/29/2017

Dear John, What is your solution to this? We have an older, out of the house child (30 years old), who is sowing seeds of discontent with his younger siblings (teens) who still live at home. He...

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What's a School Counselor to Do?

Posted on 3/13/2017

Hi John, I'm a K-12 School Counselor and schools today have many challenges. One of them involves working with kids in junior high and high school who are failing, school is not working for...

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No, No, No!

Posted on 3/10/2017

I have a two and half year old and 13 month old. My concern is I always feel like I am correcting the oldest, no yelling no hitting no throwing etc and I am beginning to feel like I fuss all the...

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5 and 3 1/2 yo boys over the top silly

Posted on 3/8/2017

I have a five year old son and 3 1/2 year old son. I am very familiar with and have read several of Rosemond's books, most recently, The Well Behaved Child. I use the ticket system with both...

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Shocking Discovery

Posted on 3/5/2017

I recently found marijuana paraphernalia in my 18 year old daughter's room. She is a senior in high school and, up until this point, a very responsible and trustworthy child. She is an excellent...

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Sticky Fingers

Posted on 3/4/2017

Our five year old (foster) son has begun stealing things from other children's book bags (or toys that are left out) at his after-school program. He's a curious little fellow and has a hard time...

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Please?

Posted on 2/28/2017

Can you give me your advice on the use of the word "please" when addressing our children? Should we be avoiding this word when issuing instructions to the children, but otherwise it is fine? ...

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Playing with children - this mom gets it.

Posted on 2/22/2017

My daughters (currently 5 and 7) ask me to play with toys with them (specifically) every few days. I have told them that they don’t need me to play and I have things I need to get done around the...

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Note to self - don't leave this 5 year old alone with friends.

Posted on 2/16/2017

I have a 5yo boy who is not respectful of other people's things. During a party at a friend's house with lots of children, he tore the thumbs off of oversized "Hulk hands". At his sister's...

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The doctor says...

Posted on 2/14/2017

Hello, I have a 6 (7 in May) year-old daughter who is the oldest girl of three. She's very bright, articulate, caring, giving...you get the drift. As she's gotten older, she has started to...

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4 y/o Bedtime Monster

Posted on 2/14/2017

Our 4 year old great-grandson has been living with us for almost 8 months. He is fairly good during the day (unless he has not had a nap). He goes to preschool 3 days a week. And went to the...

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Teenaged son not making the grade

Posted on 2/7/2017

My 13 year old son is bright but very lazy when it comes to school work and grades. Even though he tested as gifted, he does not want to put the time or effort in that is required to do well. We...

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Troubled Young Teen?

Posted on 2/5/2017

This question is in reference to the October 2016 question regarding my 13 year old's act of vandalism. Fast forward 8 months later. He has completed his punishment, but not without having to...

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Don't Ask, Do Tell!

Posted on 1/29/2017

I have a 13 year old who has always been defiant. She is bright, and a fantastic kid, but when she is asked to do something she doesn't wan, the fight is on. She will not do what I ask, or will...

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Ask them no questions...

Posted on 1/21/2017

My 15 year old has been lying. Last month it was about getting homework done after a busy weekend of chorus performances when she actually was planning on asking a pushover teacher for an...

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Help With Ongoing Tantrums

Posted on 1/21/2017

Our 9-year old daughter has been prone to tantrums all of her life. The trigger is usually not getting her way--not getting to do what she wants, wear what she wants, etc...and these have usually...

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Immature Teen Has Cursing Problems

Posted on 1/18/2017

We have an immature 16-year-old with a potty mouth. This son of ours has mental delays as well. Strikes us as closer to 12 or so mentally. We have ten children, some adopted with handicaps. This...

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Three year olds and daycare

Posted on 1/16/2017

Just newly 3 year old at daycare not minding teachers running around Not minding when in time-out About 15-18 children in room with 2 teachers Mother had taken away privileges at home later....

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Cell phone give and take

Posted on 1/14/2017

In the chapter in Teen Proofing about consequences, John does not mention electronics or cell phones. I know he does not feel that kids should have them in the first place, but for those of us...

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New shoes problems

Posted on 1/9/2017

One of our 9-year-old twins is very particular on how clothing items fit. I took her shoe shopping and she picked out two pairs of shoes: sneakers and church shoes (at the store I asked her to be...

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Illicit teen boy sleepovers

Posted on 1/4/2017

What is your opinion on "sleepovers" for teenage boys? My son is a good kid but has chosen a friend group that is experimenting with alcohol and pot...Good kids with good parents, but wanting to...

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Out of control 5 and 3 y/o boys

Posted on 1/3/2017

Hello, I am doing a miserable job as a parent to my two boys (aged 5 and 3). They are out of hand entirely. We can't get through prayers at the dinner table without at least one of them being...

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2 yo Destructive and Attention Seeking

Posted on 1/2/2017

I just brought home a newborn, and my two year old seems to be having trouble adjusting. Before, he would go outside and play on his own. I knew I would need this trend to continue as I would have...

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Distraught dad of tweens

Posted on 12/30/2016

Please help - i am the father of a 12 year old girl and a 10 year old boy. They are both spoilt brats who only care about their enjoyment. 1)They are very rude and dont listen. 2)They dont...

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Angst update

Posted on 12/18/2016

Teenage girl and her angst I spoke to her later that day and let her know that I would be going to her game. The, "I am done listening to you" continues. I agree with the alarm. she has...

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Teenage girl and her angst

Posted on 12/9/2016

I have a 16 yr old daughter, who tells me, when I start to give her information about something in general," I don't want to listen to you." She gets up, walks to her room closes the door." This...

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Parenting the Terminally Ill

Posted on 12/8/2016

Do parenting rules change when parenting a young adult (19) with a chronic/terminal illness. My husband's son (and 16 yr old daughter) have cystic fibrosis. While their health is generally good...

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How many tickets for 4 year olds?

Posted on 12/2/2016

I have 4.5 year old boy girl twins and I would like to use the ticket system you have. I would like to use it for a targeted behavior (different for each child ) but don't know how many tickets...

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Problems with live-in adult stepdaughter

Posted on 11/26/2016

My stepdaughter, Mary, and her 7 1/2 year old granddaughter, Ann, moved in with us in NY since her husband is an alcoholic and in rehab in CA. She finally landed a good job here in her...

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Teaching Toddlers Independence

Posted on 11/20/2016

My son is 2 years old and we have been working on independent play. We have paired down toys and made sure they are creative ones you recommend and eliminated most tv. He does well playing alone...

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Disrespectful 4 y/o

Posted on 11/19/2016

I have a 4 year old daughter that has developed a teenager-attitude. When teaching or disciplining her, the nasty attitude (eye rolling, hurtful and sassy words, hands on hips, etc) takes over. ...

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