John's Articles
5-Year-Old Play Time
Posted on 6/7/2005
Kidding about 'kid time' Q: I am the mother of a 5-year-old son. Because our neighborhood has very few children, he has attended part-time preschool since he was 3. We are concerned that he is...
Read MoreToo Many Choices for 4-Year-Old
Posted on 2/8/2005
DON'T GIVE A YOUNG CHILD TOO MANY CHOICES Q: When presented with a choice, our 4-year-old son has started asking, "Well, if you were me, what would you do?" If we don't give him the answer...
Read More15-Year-Old's Socialization and Self-Esteem
Posted on 12/21/2004
Q: My 15-year-old son has low self-esteem and no close friends. I suppose those two things go hand-in-hand. He plays on the school soccer team with daily practices that take place nearly five...
Read More5-Year-Old Should Entertain Self
Posted on 4/13/2004
5-YEAR-OLD SHOULD ENTERTAIN SELF Q: My 5-year-old son is a real people person. Several times a week he cries because he wants someone to play with him. I set aside 30-45 minutes each day to...
Read More7-Year-Old Needs to Develop Self-Discipline
Posted on 3/2/2004
HELP SON DEVELOP SELF-DISCIPLINE Q: Our 7-year-old son has been obsessed with airplanes since he was 2. I do not use the term lightly - anyone who meets him is floored by his knowledge of...
Read More5-Year-Old Friend Issue
Posted on 10/28/2003
LET 5-YEAR-OLD FIND OWN WAY TO DEAL WITH FRIENDS Q: My daughter is 5, going on 6. She is smart, outgoing, verbal, and very sensitive. The other day she told me that her very good friend was not...
Read More5-Year-Old Needs to Occupy Self
Posted on 10/7/2003
SHOW KIDS THEY'RE SMART ENOUGH TO OCCUPY THEMSELVES Q: I'm a single mom who works full-time from home. At noon, I pick up my 5-year-old from her half-day kindergarten program. Unfortunately,...
Read More6-Year-Old Does Not Make Eye Contact with Others
Posted on 9/3/2002
LAY DOWN THE LAW ABOUT 6-YEAR-OLD'S LACK OF EYE CONTACT Q: My daughter is 6, and I am concerned because she rarely makes eye contact when speaking to anyone. Stacy is very bright, listens well,...
Read More8-Year-Old Has No Interest in Making Friends
Posted on 7/30/2002
INTROVERSION ISN'T NECESSARILY A PROBLEM Q: Our 8-year-old daughter has almost no interest in making friends. Her behaviors are not anti-social, but she seems perfectly content to play by...
Read More3-Year-Old Imaginary Playmate
Posted on 10/23/2001
Q: Our 3-year-old daughter has an imaginary playmate named "Slubby." No kidding. How she came up with the name is anyone's guess. We know that imaginary playmates per se are not a problem, but...
Read More7-Year-Old is a Loner
Posted on 6/5/2001
IF SON'S AN INTROVERT,JUST LET HIM BE HIMSELF Q. Our 7-year-old son is turning out to be a "loner" in that he isn't really interested in socializing with other children unless they're at least...
Read More6-Year-Old Boy Prefers Playing with Girls and Dolls
Posted on 1/26/1999
SON WHO PLAYS WITH DOLLS IS NOT THE ONE WITH A PROBLEM Q. Much to our chagrin, our 6-year-old son Robbie has always preferred to play with dolls and other "girl'' things. He also prefers...
Read More3-Year-Old Has Imaginary Playmate
Posted on 12/26/1996
IMAGINARY PLAYMATE IS AN IMAGINARY WORRY Q. Our 3-year-old daughter, Courtney, has developed an imaginary playmate - named Jennifer - and the time she spends in fantasy is beginning to worry...
Read More9-Year-Old Says Bad Things About Himself
Posted on 6/20/1996
DON'T LET CHILD'S SELF-CRITICISM BECOME LIFELONG HABIT Q. Our 9-year-old often will say things like "I'm no good,'' "I'm stupid'' or "I can't do anything right'' when he's upset about...
Read MoreShy 7-Year-Old
Posted on 1/11/1996
DOES SHY 7-YEAR-OLD GIRL HAVE LOW SELF-ESTEEM, OR WAS SHE BORN THAT WAY? Q. My 7-year-old has always been extremely shy. Even as an infant, she seemed very sensitive to new situations and new...
Read MoreShy 5-Year-Old
Posted on 12/10/1993
SHY CHILDREN SEEM TO BE BORN THAT WAY, STUDIES SHOW Q. My 5-year-old daughter has always been somewhat shy and inhibited. Even as an infant, she seemed extremely sensitive to new situations and...
Read More9-Year-Old Uniterested in Making Friends
Posted on 4/1/1990
IF CHILD LIKES BEING ALONE, DON'T MAKE IT INTO A PROBLEM Q. Our 9-year-old son seems uninterested in making friends. Both at school and in the neighborhood, he seems content to play by...
Read More8-Year-Old Bothering Other Children at School
Posted on 2/11/1990
LET CHILD SOLVE PROBLEM SOMETIMES A good general chooses his battles carefully, knows that retreat can be strategic, and understands that it is sometimes necessary to lose the battle to win...
Read More11-Year-Old No Longer Close to Parents
Posted on 12/25/1988
KEEP THE LINES OPEN, BUT DON'T CALL TOO OFTEN Q. A communication problem has recently developed between us and our 11- year-old son. We used to be very close and affectionate toward one...
Read MoreToo Much Sympathy For Child Can Create More Problems
Posted on 7/3/1988
TOO MUCH SYMPATHY CAN BE ADDICTING FOR CHILDREN I frequently encourage parents to stop sympathizing with their children's problems and begin empathizing with them instead. They often tell me...
Read More12-Year-Old Hanging Around Wrong Crowd
Posted on 2/28/1988
12-YEAR-OLD HAS TO MAKE OWN MISTAKES TO LEARN Q. Our 12-year-old son has always been well-behaved, responsible and honest. This year, he started junior high school and begin hanging around...
Read More9-Year-Old Complains About Visiting Dad
Posted on 2/1/1987
9-YEAR-OLD MAY WANT MORE TIME WITH HIS FRIENDS Q: I am a divorced, single mother with one child - an active, well- adjusted 9-year-old son. With few exceptions, he spends every weekend,...
Read More3-Year-Old's Imaginary Friend
Posted on 1/25/1987
IMAGINARY FRIEND HELPS CHILD GROW Q: Our 3-year-old daughter has recently invented an imaginary playmate whom she calls "Cindy." She is beginning to spend more and more time playing with Cindy,...
Read More15-Year-Old's Friends
Posted on 6/29/1986
Q. Our 15-year-old son has a lot of friends. Some are kids we approve of, while some are not. He has friends from the "in crowd" and he has friends from the other end of the social spectrum,...
Read More4-Year-Old's Need to be Center of Attention
Posted on 3/23/1986
THERE'S HELP FOR ATTENTION-ADDICT CHILD "My husband and I both work," she said, she being the young mother of a 4-year-old daughter. She was seeking advice concerning her daughter's apparent...
Read More7-Year-Old Girl Feels Left Out
Posted on 9/15/1985
CHILD'S SOCIAL SUCCESS HAS IMPACT UPON SELF-ESTEEM Q. Our 7-year-old is in the second grade in a public school. However, all of the other children her age in our neighborhood attend the...
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