John's Articles
6-Year-Old Does Not Talk About School Day
Posted on 12/12/2000
JUST DON'T PUSH YOUR FIRST-GRADER; SHE'LL EVENTUALLY TALK ABOUT SCHOOL Q. My 6-year-old daughter is in the first grade, and other than the papers she brings home I have no idea what or how...
Read More12th Grader Doesn't Want to go to College
Posted on 11/28/2000
TRUST AN ABLE 12TH-GRADER TO STEER HIMSELF IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION Q. Our 12th-grade son, an honor student, has recently told us he doesn't want to go to college. Instead, he wants to become a...
Read MoreHomework is not Parents' Job
Posted on 10/3/2000
HOVERING OVER HOMEWORK ISN'T PARENTS' JOB An outraged mother recently showed me a letter received from her son's second-grade teacher, the theme of which was the importance of parental...
Read More13-Year-Old Homework Issue
Posted on 8/1/2000
TEENS WILL RESIST YOUR ATTEMPTS TO 'MICROMANAGE' THEIR LIVES Q. My 13-year-old son waits until the last possible moment to begin doing his homework. He no longer has a set bedtime, but he must...
Read MoreParents Making a Difference
Posted on 5/9/2000
YES, PARENTS CAN MAKE A BIG DIFFERENCE I began soliciting "Parenting at its Best" stories about six months ago and have received quite a number of good ones, but this one is in the top 10....
Read More10-Year-Old School Issues
Posted on 4/25/2000
ADD? NO, THIS SOUNDS LIKE A CASE OF SSS Q. I am apparently the mom of a severely messed-up 10 year-old. According to his teacher, he shows signs of attention deficit disorder (about 3 out of...
Read More12-Year-Old in Danger of Failing 6th Grade
Posted on 2/15/2000
ONLY YOUR 6TH-GRADER CAN DECIDE HE SHOULD GET SERIOUS ABOUT SCHOOL Q. Our 12-year-old son is in danger of failing the sixth grade and, as usual, doesn't seem to care. Everyone agrees he's...
Read More7-Year-Old has Difficulty Completing Written Assignments
Posted on 12/21/1999
LEFTY SON MAY JUST NEED PENMANSHIP PRACTICE Q. Our 7-year-old, second-grade son has difficulty completing written assignments, including math. He is left-handed and has some difficulty with...
Read MoreSchools Spending Money on Parent Lawsuits
Posted on 10/19/1999
SCHOOLS JUST CAN'T WIN IN LAWSUIT GAME If you want to know where a good amount of the money is going, going, gone in public education, it's into hiring defense attorneys to fight lawsuits that...
Read MoreTeacher's High Expectations of Students Gets Short-Changed by Parents
Posted on 8/31/1999
PARENTS DON'T LET SCHOOLS DEMAND KIDS' BEST Q. As an elementary teacher, I require that my students complete assignments and behave appropriately to earn the privilege of playtime and fun...
Read More4-Year-Old with Constant Stream of Questions
Posted on 8/17/1999
CHILD NEEDS TO ANSWER HIS OWN QUESTION Q. I am a first-year teacher of 4-year-olds in a private prekindergarten program. In my college program in child development, it was axiomatic that one...
Read MorePublic School Education
Posted on 7/27/1999
TEACHERS' GROUP HAS LED PUBLIC EDUCATION ASTRAY A teacher's union paper in New York recently reprinted a column of mine, headlined, "Re-arrange the Letters in 'Rosemond' and You Get 'Moron...
Read More1st Grader Not Finishing Assignments in Class
Posted on 5/25/1999
Q. At least twice a week, my son's first-grade teacher sends home assignments he should have finished in class but didn't because of dawdling. It's obvious the teacher doesn't, and won't, penalize...
Read MoreSelf-Esteem, Self-Control and School Shootings
Posted on 4/27/1999
SCHOOLS VALUE SELF ESTEEM BUT IGNORE SELF CONTROL I've always thought investigative reporter Ed Bradley (''60 Minutes'') made reasonably good sense, even when I've disagreed with him. Not this...
Read MoreChallenge Miss Tardy to Beat Inspection Bell
Posted on 3/30/1999
<b>Q. Our 6-year-old drags her feet every school morning. I end up helping her dress, brushing her hair, etc., in order to get out the door on time. I've tried everything from rewards to spanking....
Read More5-Year-Old Has Anxiety Over School
Posted on 11/24/1998
CHILD'S FEAR IS REAL, BUT SHE'LL GET OVER IT WITH HELP Q. My 5-year-old daughter was so nervous on the first day of school that she threw up shortly after getting there. Since then, she's been...
Read MoreKids No Longer Take Responsbility for Misbehavior
Posted on 9/8/1998
WE'VE TRAINED A GENERATION NOT TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY One of the mantras oft recited by the psychologists of my generation is "criticize the behavior, not the child.'' For example, instead of...
Read MoreComputer Educational Games
Posted on 8/4/1998
COMPUTERS AREN'T MAGIC; BUT STUDENT'S MOTIVATION IS Q. Our elementary school principal is all fired up about a multimedia educational packet that will allow our children, grades K-6, to take...
Read MoreMom Worried That 3-Year-Old Is Not Prepared for Preschool
Posted on 7/28/1998
PRESCHOOLERS NEED SOCIAL SKILLS, BUT NOT SOCIAL STUDIES Q. My friends and I both have 3-year-old boys who will enter 4-year-old kindergarten this fall. I'm concerned because her son knows how...
Read More12-Year-Old Athlete Not Maintaining Good Grades
Posted on 7/21/1998
GRADES SLIPPED; MUST CHILD MISS SOCCER TOURNAMENT? Q. Four years ago, we adopted an 8-year-old girl with multiple developmental and behavior problems. Prior to joining our family, she had been...
Read MoreInstead of Retention, Create Transitional Grades
Posted on 6/16/1998
TRANSITIONAL GRADES COULD HELP END RETENTION Ten years ago, the National Association of School Psychologists published a position paper claiming that retention - holding a child back in grade...
Read MoreSchool Shootings: Guns are not the Problem
Posted on 6/9/1998
GUNS ARE NOT THE PROBLEM; NEW LACK OF DISCIPLINE IS For reasons obvious to all except those who've been on an extended media fast, the 1997-98 school year may well become known as the "Year of...
Read MoreADD is Real
Posted on 6/2/1998
ADD IS REAL, BUT RETHINK CAUSES AND TREATMENT In a May 10 commentary, Andrea Brunais, editorial page editor for The Tallahassee Democrat, says I don't believe in attention deficit disorder. Oh...
Read MoreParents Believing Kids More Than Teachers
Posted on 5/12/1998
THE CASE OF THE LYING' TEACHER SHOWS PARENTS ARE OUT OF TOUCH WITH TRUTH The following story, told to me by a fourth-grade teacher, illustrates how parents with good intentions are often their...
Read MoreSingle Most Important Thing a Preschool Child Can Learn
Posted on 3/17/1998
ABOVE ALL, YOUR KINDERGARTNER SHOULD KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH TIME Many school systems across America send parents of upcoming kindergarten students a laundry list of things those children are...
Read MoreReason American Students are Behind the Rest of the World in Education
Posted on 3/10/1998
IT'S PARENTS WHO LET WORLD LEAVE BRIGHT KIDS BEHIND The news is in, and the news is bad . . . again. American high school seniors rank among the world's worst in math and science. But...
Read More7-Year-Old Won't Dress Herself on School Mornings
Posted on 1/20/1998
PUT BURDEN OF DRESSING ON AMANDA'S SHOULDERS Q. Our 7-year-old daughter won't dress herself on school mornings. After we wake her up, Amanda goes into a "limp dishrag'' routine. I usually...
Read More5-Year-Old is not Challenged in Kindergarten
Posted on 10/7/1997
SCHOOLS CAN'T DO IT ALL, SO PARENTS HAVE TO STEP IN Q. My 5-year-old has always been extremely inquisitive and seems to have an unquenchable thirst for knowledge. He started public school...
Read MoreLink Between ADD and Watching TV - Part 2
Posted on 9/16/1997
READERS DON'T BUY THEORY LINKING ADD, TV VIEWING My recent column on the possible link between television and attention-deficit disorder (also known as attention-deficit hyperactivity...
Read MoreBack-To-School Tips
Posted on 9/9/1997
GET YOUR CHILD FOCUSED FIRST ON SCHOOL, RESPONSIBILITY It seems every journalist who has called me lately wants to know if I have any back-to-school tips for parents. Before I share some with...
Read MoreLink Between ADD and Watching TV - Part 1
Posted on 7/1/1997
TV SHRIVELS KIDS' BRAINS; ADD PROS PAY NO ATTENTION As heralded by a cover story in Time (Feb. 3, 1997) and a special issue of Newsweek (spring/summer '97) the big story of the past year has...
Read MoreParents Are Concerned About the Amount of Homework
Posted on 5/6/1997
PILING ON HOMEWORK CAN DO SERIOUS DAMAGE Q. The private school our children attend places a great deal of emphasis on homework. We are parents who are concerned not with the homework itself,...
Read MoreKindergartener is Wild at School, but Mild at Home
Posted on 4/8/1997
BILLY'S MILD AT HOME, WILD IN KINDERGARTEN Q. Shortly after our son started kindergarten in the fall, his teacher told us he was overly excitable. He runs, shouts, has difficulty waiting his...
Read MoreThird Grade Teacher Dealing with Boys Who Have Difficulty With Self-Control
Posted on 3/6/1997
OK, GIVE PRAISE A CHANCE, BUT DON'T GO OVERBOARD Q. I am a third-grade teacher who is dealing with several boys who have difficulty with self-control. Our school psychologist recommended an...
Read MoreTeacher of 6-Year-Old Who Has Trouble Learning to Read Thinks He Has Dyslexia
Posted on 1/16/1997
IF EVALUATION REVEALS DYSLEXIA, BE SURE CHILD WILL BE TAUGHT BY CORRECT METHOD Q. My 6-year-old is having difficulty learning to read, and his teacher - who teaches by what she calls the...
Read MoreTeacher Demands Too Much Reading for 1st Graders
Posted on 10/31/1996
TEACHER'S RULE IS TURNING OFF THIS BUDDING READER Q. At the beginning of the school year, our daughter's first-grade teacher sent a note requesting parents have their children read to them for...
Read MoreParents, not Teachers, are the Reason for Decline in Education
Posted on 10/17/1996
THE PROBLEM WITH SCHOOLS? PARENTS Richard Louv, a columnist for The San Diego Union-Tribune, began a recent column as follows: "At the beginning of the school year, it's good to remember the...
Read MoreReason Behind Increased Rates of Teen Depression, Drug/Alcohol Use, and Violence
Posted on 8/8/1996
FEEL-GOOD' PARENTING IS HURTING OUR CHILDREN For years, the politically correct explanation for the rise of depression, suicide, violence and drug and alcohol use among America's teens has been...
Read MoreADD Exists
Posted on 7/4/1996
YES, I DO BELIEVE ATTENTION DEFICIT DISORDER EXISTS I have apparently created the impression that I don't believe in attention deficit disorder. The fact is, during my professional career,...
Read MoreWhole Language Method
Posted on 5/9/1996
WHOLE LANGUAGE' METHOD WORKS? NONSENSE In a letter to the Albuquerque Journal, a teacher says a recent column of mine on the "whole language'' approach to reading omits important information;...
Read More8-Year-Old Misses Bus So Mom Makes Him Walk To School
Posted on 3/28/1996
DONE WITH LOVE, DISCIPLINE WORKS A reader in Birmingham, Ala., recently wrote to confirm that good old-fashioned discipline still works. Her incident started when she purchased a shirt for...
Read MoreSchool Expects Parents to be Involved in Homework
Posted on 3/7/1996
PARENTAL INVOLVEMENT IN HOMEWORK USUALLY UNWISE Q. Last week you said, "There's nothing that so robs a child of the lasting benefits of homework like parents who are benevolently involved.''...
Read More8-Year-Old Takes Forever To Finish School Work
Posted on 2/29/1996
HOW TO HELP 8-YEAR-OLD STOP DAWDLING, START MOVING Q. Our 8-year-old son is reasonably intelligent and has no learning problems, but he takes forever to finish his work. An assignment that...
Read MoreProfessional Says ADD is a Myth
Posted on 11/24/1995
CHEERS FOR CHALLENGING ATTENTION-DEFICIT MYTH In his new book, "The Myth of the A.D.D. (Attention Deficit Disorder) Child'' (Dutton, $23.95), psychologist Thomas Armstrong writes: "A.D.D....
Read MoreSchools Need to Return to Traditional Roots
Posted on 11/17/1995
SCHOOLS NEED A GIANT STEP BACKWARD A woman recently told me, during casual conversation, that her fifth-grade daughter had just been assigned to write a one-page report on how she feels about...
Read MoreDiscipline Problems in Schools Come Primarily from Families
Posted on 9/29/1995
WE DON'T PAY ENOUGH ATTENTION TO SCHOOL DISCIPLINE USA Today recently carried two articles that caught my eye. The first, on the front page, reported that "Americans rate poor discipline as...
Read MorePet Peeves - Part 3 (School-Related Issues)
Posted on 9/1/1995
WORDS FOR YOU PARENTS WHO DISRESPECT THE TEACHER This is the third column in my "pet peeve'' series. Given that a new school year is upon us, it's appropriate that I share several...
Read MoreHomework Help
Posted on 8/4/1995
KIDS OFTEN SEEK HOMEWORK HELP THEY DON'T NEED Q. During a seminar in Connecticut, you shocked me by saying parents should only give homework help one out of four times a child asks for it. I...
Read MorePublic School vs Private School vs Parochial School - Part 2
Posted on 7/21/1995
DON'T LIKE PUBLIC SCHOOLS? CAN'T AFFORD MOST PRIVATE ONES? TRY THIS A few weeks past, I summarized the problems plaguing America's public schools, including administrative bloat, drastically...
Read MorePublic Schools vs Private Schools - Part 1
Posted on 6/30/1995
PUBLIC SCHOOL IS NO LONGER BEST OPTION Q. Our daughter begins kindergarten in the fall, and we are in a quandary concerning whether to send her to public or private school. Do you have any...
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