"Children show respect for parents by obeying them. Parents show respect for children by expecting them to obey. "

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3 1/2-Year-Old Is Overly Cautious

Posted on 7/2/2002

SON TOO YOUNG TO HANDLE WARNINGS ABOUT FIRES, STRANGERS Q: My 3 1/2-year-old son has always been overly cautious. He is scared of trying anything new and this includes things other kids his age...

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3-Year-Old Carries Around Kitchen Towels

Posted on 6/11/2002

LET THE CHILD KEEP HIS SECURITY TOWEL Q: About two years ago, our 3-year-old son developed a fondness for kitchen towels, similar to some children's attachment to security blankets. At first,...

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Better to Toilet Train on Child-Size Potty or Big Toilet?

Posted on 6/4/2002

Q: I'm about to start toilet training my 24-month-old daughter. Is it better to have her learn on a child-size potty or on a child's seat attached to the big toilet? A: This is a matter of...

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30-Month-Old Bedwetting

Posted on 5/21/2002

LET 'DAY-TRAINED' TOT LEARN FROM NIGHTTIME ACCIDENTS Q: I have read that nighttime potty training should occur between 30 and 36 months. My son will be 30 months in just weeks and has been day...

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Adoptive Parents Refused to Give Up on Stubborn 2 1/2-Year-Old

Posted on 4/2/2002

MOM'S HAPPY SHE PUT FOOT DOWN Like most people, I love a good story that ends happily. Such is the story I am about to relate. In November, a mom wrote asking for help with her 2...

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Sippy Cups

Posted on 3/19/2002

DISPUTE OVER SIPPY CUPS POINTS TO LAZY PARENTING The front page of The Wall Street Journal on Feb. 12 blared the shocking news: The sippy cup - the spill-free cup used by most American...

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32-Month-Old Potty Training

Posted on 2/26/2002

BOY IS VERY CAPABLE OF POTTY TRAINING Q: I tried toilet training my 32-month-old boy, but after a couple of days of no success, I decided to stop and try again later. My friend says I need to...

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3- and 4-Year-Old Refuse to Leave Preschool Class with Mom

Posted on 2/19/2002

SURPRISE CONSEQUENCES CAN CURE CHILDREN'S MISBEHAVIOR A mom recently asked me for advice concerning a discipline problem that had had a small beginning, but was getting completely out of hand....

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Toilet Training and Bedtime Issues

Posted on 11/20/2001

PARENTS ARE GOING BACK TO THE BASICS An analysis of the 3,000-plus questions submitted to date to my Web site suggests the two biggest problems besetting American parents concern the toilet and...

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3-Year-Old Imaginary Playmate

Posted on 10/23/2001

Q: Our 3-year-old daughter has an imaginary playmate named "Slubby." No kidding. How she came up with the name is anyone's guess. We know that imaginary playmates per se are not a problem, but...

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Midde Child Syndrome Has Easy Cure

Posted on 9/18/2001

GIVE THAT MIDDLE CHILD A TICKET FOR EACH ACTING-UP INCIDENT Q. Do you believe in "middle child syndrome" and if so what are some ways to avoid it? My husband and I have three boys - 6, 3, and...

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Mom-Care is Generally Better Than Daycare

Posted on 5/22/2001

CLOSED MINDS SHUT OUT VITAL RESEARCH ON DAY CARE We live in the postmodern age, which is characterized by a rampant anti-intellectualism. It matters not, for example, that objective evidence...

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3-Year-Old Toilet Training Issue

Posted on 3/27/2001

2 SWATS ARE FROWNED ON, BUT MOM'S SMILING Several weeks ago, I wrote a column on "psychologically incorrect discipline" (PID) - the sort of discipline many if not most mental health...

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3-Year-Old Boy Dresses in Girls' Clothing

Posted on 3/20/2001

DON'T WORRY - WHEN TODDLERS PLAY DRESS-UP, THERE'S NO GENDER AGENDA Q. We've always made all manner of toys available to our twin 3-year-olds, a boy and a girl. Nevertheless, our son tends to...

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Posted on 3/6/2001

A LITTLE COMMON SENSE YOU CAN FILE FOR LATER Good Ideas File: Responding to my recent article on pacifiers, a mother writes, "I have three children, ages 5, 7, and 9. When it came time for one...

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Child Older Than 18 Months Should Not Be Allowed to Suck on Pacifier

Posted on 2/6/2001

PARENTS, IT'S TIME TO GROW UP AND PASS ON THE PACIFIER Please bear with me while I rant and rave: What is this business of allowing children older than 6 months to walk/ride/be carried around...

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Developmental Milestones for Social Behaviors

Posted on 10/17/2000

SOCIAL SKILLS HAVE THEIR MILESTONE AGES, TOO Almost everyone is familiar with the concept of milestones as they relate to a child's developmental "health." For example, the average age of...

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3-Year-Old Being Aggressive with 5-Year-Old

Posted on 8/22/2000

POLITELY 'SUSPEND' PLAYTIME WITH A CHILD WHO KICKS, BITES Q. Our 5-year-old daughter and our next-door neighbor's 3-year-old daughter play together a good amount. The problem is that their...

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Day Care Issues

Posted on 7/11/2000

SCHLESSINGER TAKES OVERLY HARSH STAND ON DAY CARE It was, I suppose, inevitable that people, journalists included, would ask me what I think about the position on children and day care that...

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Experts Recommend Young Children Not Be Allowed on Computers

Posted on 6/27/2000

PEN, PAPER BETTER THAN COMPUTER AS LEARNING TOOL A growing number of experts are recommending that young children not be allowed on computers for any reason at all. These people are not...

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30-Month-Old Potty Training

Posted on 4/18/2000

PARENTS TODAY EXAGGERATE PSYCHOLOGY OF TOILET TRAINING I came across an interesting question the other day while reading my e-mail. The mother of a 30-month-old was asking for some direction...

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3- and 5-Year-Old Can Entertain Themselves

Posted on 2/1/2000

STAND UP FOR YOURSELF: LET KIDS ENTERTAIN THEMSELVES Q. I have two sons, 3 and 5, with whom I'm at home during the day. How much time should I spend one-on-one, sitting down with them, and...

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Optimal Time for Toilet Training lies between 18 and 30 Months

Posted on 1/18/2000

TOILET-TRAINING MAY HAVE A WINDOW OF OPPORTUNITY, OPEN AT 18 MONTHS I have addressed the issue of toilet training in previous columns and books. My advice has been to time the initiation of...

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Potty-Trained 3-Year-Old Wetting Bed

Posted on 12/28/1999

NO NEED TO GO BALLISTIC OVER BED-WETTING Q. Our son will be 3 in one week. He has been day and night potty trained for several months. He started Montessori school last week. A month or so...

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Parents Want to Know of Unique Challenges of Having Kids Close Together in Age

Posted on 12/14/1999

MAKE THE MOST OF WHAT YOU KNOW, AND YOUR 3 KIDS WILL BE FINE Q. We have three children: 3 years, 22 months and 9 months. Are there any insights you can share regarding any unique challenges or...

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3-Year-Old Twins Bedtime Issue

Posted on 11/9/1999

WHOSE NIGHTMARE IS BEDTIME, ANYWAY? Q. I am the grandmother of twin 3-year-old girls. My daughter has asked me to solicit your advice about two problems. First, the girls, who get along...

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3-Year-Old Crys After Dropped Off at Mother's Morning Out Program

Posted on 11/9/1999

Q. The other issue is nursery school. The girls have no one to play with except one another. My daughter recently signed them up for a "mother's morning out" program three mornings a week. One of...

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3-Year-Old Masturbates

Posted on 8/10/1999

GIVE A CHILD GOOD REASON TO STOP HER EXPLORATION Q. My nearly 3-year-old daughter masturbates excessively. At least, I think it's excessive. She started when she was about 6 months old,...

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Disposable Training Pants - Pull-Ups

Posted on 5/18/1999

DISPOSABLE TRAINING PANTS ARE NOT WORTH IT Q. My husband and I know you think children should be toilet-trained by no later than age 30 months, but we'd like to know what you think about the...

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Late Toilet Training

Posted on 3/9/1999

DISPOSE OF IDEAS ON LATE TOILET TRAINING As some readers know, I have declared all-out war on the absurd, destructive notion - touted by the likes of America's favorite pediatrician, T. Berry...

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Toilet Training

Posted on 12/15/1998

TOILET TRAINING BY AGE 2 SERVES CHILD BEST T. Berry Brazelton, who recently became the spokesperson for Pampers, and I are at odds over toilet training. We've gone point/counterpoint in...

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Toilet Training Series - Part 3

Posted on 9/15/1998

EARLY TOILET TRAINING CALLS FOR VOICES OF EXPERIENCE Q. My mother tells me she and her siblings were completely toilet trained by age 18 months, but she doesn't know how. My mother is the...

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Toilet Training Series - Part 2

Posted on 9/1/1998

HERE'S NAKED TRUTH ON $75 POTTY TRAINING At the end of last week's column, after blasting away at the parenting experts who came up with what's called "child-oriented'' toilet training, I...

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Toilet Training Series - Part 1

Posted on 8/25/1998

IT'S PARENTS' RESPONSIBILITY TO DECIDE ON POTTY TRAINING Q. What are your feelings about the idea, as expressed by (a well-known parenting authority) that "only the child knows when he's ready...

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Mom Worried That 3-Year-Old Is Not Prepared for Preschool

Posted on 7/28/1998

PRESCHOOLERS NEED SOCIAL SKILLS, BUT NOT SOCIAL STUDIES Q. My friends and I both have 3-year-old boys who will enter 4-year-old kindergarten this fall. I'm concerned because her son knows how...

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Day Care Update

Posted on 3/31/1998

UPDATE ON DAY CARE: IT'S STILL NOT AS HEALTHY AS ADVERTISED Five years ago, I wrote a series of columns in which I contended that group day care is disadvantageous for children under age 3....

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Single Most Important Thing a Preschool Child Can Learn

Posted on 3/17/1998

ABOVE ALL, YOUR KINDERGARTNER SHOULD KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH TIME Many school systems across America send parents of upcoming kindergarten students a laundry list of things those children are...

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Mom of 4-Year-Old Agonizes Over Academics

Posted on 2/24/1998

LEAVE IT UP TO YOUR CHILD TO LEARN FROM EITHER TEACHER Q. I work daily with my very active 4-year-old, trying to get him started in reading, but he doesn't show any real interest. Furthermore,...

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Mom of 3-Year-Old Wants to be Friends with her Child

Posted on 2/17/1998

KIDS NEED PARENTS; YOU CAN BE FRIENDS LATER Q. On a recent radio talk show, you said today's parents make problems for both themselves and their children by trying to be friends with them. I...

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Children Should Be Accountable For Their Behavior

Posted on 12/16/1997

WHEN CHILD GETS TO AGE 2, PUSH HIM OUT OF PARADISE In Genesis 2 and 3, Adam and Eve - after being told not to do so - eat from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. When God discovers what...

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Quick-and-Easy Potty Training - Part 2

Posted on 9/30/1997

SUCCESSFUL POTTY TRAINING NEEDS A TOUCH OF DRY HUMOR As promised in last week's column, today's column will reveal the secrets of quick-and-easy toilet training; but first, a brief recap:...

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Quick-and-Easy Potty Training - Part 1

Posted on 9/23/1997

COME WHAT MAY' APPROACH TO POTTY TRAINING IS ALL WET Q. My son is 28 months old and not yet toilet-trained. My mother-in-law says he should no longer be wearing diapers, but on a recent talk...

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3 Understandings That Parents Should Communicate to Children by Age 3

Posted on 6/3/1997

RULES FOR RAISING CHILDREN RESPONSIBLY COME IN SETS OF 3 One of the main themes of my sixth book, "A Family Of Value'' (Andrews and McMeel, 1996), concerns three fundamental understandings...

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3-Year-Old Gags and Throws Up When Upset

Posted on 3/18/1997

NO WONDER ROLLO RETCHES - IT WORKS Q. I'll bet you've never gotten this question before. Our 3-year-old was premature and had some mild but nonetheless anxiety-provoking developmental...

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3-Year-Old Has Imaginary Playmate

Posted on 12/26/1996

IMAGINARY PLAYMATE IS AN IMAGINARY WORRY Q. Our 3-year-old daughter, Courtney, has developed an imaginary playmate - named Jennifer - and the time she spends in fantasy is beginning to worry...

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3-Year-Old Addicted to Pacifier

Posted on 5/16/1996

IS OUR 3-YEAR-OLD TOO DEPENDENT ON HIS PACIFIER? Q. Our 3-year-old son seems addicted to his pacifier. Over the past year, we've limited its use to his bed, but he still comes to us four or...

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Telling the Toddler "The Doctor Says" Isn't The Same As Lying

Posted on 3/21/1996

TELLING TODDLER THE DOCTOR SAYS' ISN'T SAME AS LYING Q. In a recent column, you advised communicating rules to older toddlers and 3-year-olds by telling them the rules are from their...

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3-Year-Old Has Developed Several Fears

Posted on 8/11/1995

IT'S NORMAL FOR KIDS TO DEVELOP CERTAIN FEARS Q. Within the last month or so, our just-turned 3-year-old daughter has become afraid of the dark, barking dogs, trucks and thunder. She's also...

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3-Year-Old Hits Parents

Posted on 6/23/1995

YES, YOU CAN TEACH CHILD NOT TO HIT Q. When our 3-year-old daughter gets mad at us, she sometimes tries to hit us. We're concerned because we read an article that said children who hit their...

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Parents Don't Agree on How to Handle Discipline of 3- and 6-Year-Old

Posted on 4/8/1994

PARENTS WHO DISAGREE ON ISSUES SHOULD AGREE ON HOW TO ARGUE Q. My husband and I don't always agree on how to handle situations that come up with our two children, ages 6 and 3. I'm concerned...

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